TheLeaderInside.com

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.”

- Wayne Dyer

One frustration I’ve had over the past few months has been the image I’ve had of myself and the overall satisfaction-level of the results from my efforts. It has been lacking — partly because of the fear of losing money — partly because of the stresses and time factors involved in relocating geographically — and partly because of not creating sufficient productive time in my business pursuits.

In the past two days I’ve had the wonderful experience of being shown a great book, “Internet Business Manifesto” by Rich Schefren. (This was shown to me by my partner here at TLI, Bentley — Thanks Bentley!) Here’s the link that I got from Bentley … http://www.strategicprofits.com/manifesto/

Anyway, the reading, and rereading of this book has set me on the path to some serious changes.

Then, this morning, I had this wonderful article in my email. The following is reprinted with permission from Kickstart Today by Martin Avis www.kickstartdaily.com

I hope you enjoy it ….

~~~ DBL-R

Each and every one of us goes through life with a big label pinned to our back. We don’t see it, but everyone else does. And the way other people respond and react to us is determined by what they read on that invisible label.

Every action you take in life serves to make certain comments on your label bigger and bolder or smaller and harder to read. It is like having your whole personality laid bare.

But sometimes the words on our labels are not the words we would like the world to judge us by.

How many times have you bristled because somebody has prejudged your responses?

It could be simple things like:

‘I KNOW you won’t do the washing up.’ ‘I KNOW you won’t be polite to my mother.’ ‘I KNOW that you’ll spend more than you earn.’

Or important things like:

‘We KNOW he won’t be up to the job.’ ‘I’m SURE he isn’t trustworthy.’ ‘He NEVER tells the truth.’

None of those things may be true. You may have deserved them once or twice, but on the whole you are not that person. But what matters is what the other person reads on your label, not what you would like them to see.

The more people do see these attributes in you, the more likely you are to live down to them. It is human nature to subconsciously adapt our behavior to make ourselves fit into whatever mold other people establish for us.

And that way leads to mediocrity.

Success, on the other hand, is reached by tearing off the label that has grown on your back and taking control of the pen that writes the new one.

Success is about becoming the person YOU want to be and showing the world that negative images don’t fit you at all.

Everything currently on your label is about the past. Tom Hopkins writes, ‘The past is a bucket of ashes – throw them out instead of trying to reburn them.’

Make your label about who you really are now. And who you intend to become. We all have to have labels, so live UP to your ones. Show the world that you are even better than they think.

If you make a decision right now to change your labels for the better and do one thing every single day to live up to them, success will find you – you’ll never need to go looking again.

Something that I started a couple of years ago was to write “My Story”. I’m not sure if the motivation for doing so was a form of self-therapy, or whether it was just my desire to put something in writing for my children. That story has now evolved into a full-blown novel based on “My Story” and the first draft is about two-thirds finished. (I chose to convert it to a novel to keep the identities of the people involved hidden.)

I have the feeling that everyone, at one time or another, has felt the desire to express his or her story. Whether it is merely done to read privately, to share with family or friends, or to go the full route and see about having it published, I can attest to the fact that it is an emotionally satisfying way to gain perspective on your experiences while sharing your unique voice.

We’ve all experienced feelings and events in our lives that we are longing to write down. Giving in to that urge can give you an outlet for purging any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. No one else has to read it. You may even want to write your story without reading it right away. Satisfying the need to tell your story is not predicated upon your writing ability. It does, however take effort to write down the truth in detail. Your memories, captured on paper as descriptive scenes, sights, sounds, and scents, may at first seem disconnected or incomplete. But rest assured that you possess the ability to shape your recollections into stories.

As you finish the writing each day, you may be surprised at what you have accomplished. Your story can encompass as much or as little of your life as you prefer. You may surprise yourself with new insights, or you may find yourself exploring your roots, your identity, and your future through your words. Allow your writing to guide you and write as truthfully as possible. Don’t worry about what others will think of your personal journey, your style of writing, or your words.

Research has shown that writing a personal narrative filled with feelings and perceptions can create long-term health benefits. As you write, remember to have compassion for yourself, particularly when writing about traumatic events. Your writing may help family members know you better, or they may understand themselves more through reading about your experiences.

The most important factor about expressing yourself in a permanent way is that you are giving yourself the lasting gift of allowing your voice to be heard.

~~~ DBL-R

Every so often, we just need to take a break. We need to get away from all the hustle and bustle of our daily lives. We get to the point where we can’t seem to find the forest because we’re lost in the trees. We’ve lost touch with the inner wisdom of our heart, soul and mind.

One way to do this it to go on retreat. This is more than a vacation. A retreat offers us a time to reflect, to rest, to heal, to renew our spirit. It’s a way to allow us to block out all the externals that are interfering with our ability to go within to the leader inside. We can come out of a retreat renewed, refreshed and ready to return to life with a new perspective. We can find the time to be with ourselves.

I’m off to do that myself for a few days. The retreat will give me the quiet, solitude, and for some of the time, silence. I will be going to a humble dwelling and enjoying simple fare and the sounds of nature.

When at retreat, we find that the days of contemplation make it possible to hear our heart when it speaks to us — to be able to really listen to the bird songs — to be unburdened by the pressures of timing and schedules — taking the time to smell the flowers, the grass, the earth and feel the breezes against our face. Being on retreat will give us the time to take long walks in the woods and to come to know and understand our life path more deeply.

Without the pull of deadlines, relationships, the Internet, or other media, we give ourselves time to go deep into our own solitude where we can fully reflect on our joys, sorrows, and fears, owning and releasing them as needed.

Hopefully, when we return home, we can take a little bit of this time alone back with us and create the space for deep reflection on a daily basis. We also may come back to our life renewed and ready to take on our leadership roles and the world with new insight that has arisen from within.

The beauty of going on retreat is that no matter where you go or how long you stay, you’ll always meet yourself when you get there.

~~~ DBL-R