TheLeaderInside.com

When we are going about our day-to-day business and personal lives, we are most likely interacting with others. Whenever you are interacting, you are constantly making choices about what to do with the words being said to you. If someone seems to be saying something negative to you, you may listen to their words, acknowledge them, then let them go — or — you may choose to take what they are saying personally. Taking things personally is often the result of perceiving a person’s actions or words as an affront or slight.

The thing to bear in mind is that what people say or do really has no bearing on you. If they are being negative towards you, it will usually be based on something in their own lives — their experiences, emotions or perceptions. If you take what they do or say personally, you may end up feeling hurt without reason.

One way to avoid the temptation to take a comment or action personally is to put a little space (literally and figuratively) between yourself and the other person. Take the time to check out why you feel the way you do. Are their words bringing up some deep-seated insecurity within yourself? Are you certain there was some offense intended? It also doesn’t hurt to just ask them what they meant. Oftentimes it’s nothing more than a poor choice of words.

Finally, put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Instead of taking their words as the truth, or as a personal affront, remember that whatever was said or done is based on their opinion and is more reflective of what is going on inside of them, rather than having anything to do with you. You may have been an easy target for someone having a bad day, and their comments may have been offered with no ill intentions. When you recognize that what anyone says or does doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you, you will no longer feel hurt or attacked. It’s up to you to influence your own value and sense of well-being.

Also, remember that this advice works both ways. Keep the quote at the beginning of this article in mind as you go about your leadership role in your daily life.

~~~ DBL-R

That statement is so true, isn’t it? How often do you feel as though you’re disconnected from the world? So often it seems like our actions have no major consequence in the scheme of things and we feel like we’re existing in our own vacuum.

Yet, the truth is that our simplest thought or action - the decisions we make each day, and how we see and relate to the world - can be incredibly significant and have a profound impact on the lives of those around us, as well as the world at large.

The earth and everything on it is bound by an invisible connection between people, animals, plants, the air, the water, and the soil. Even the smallest actions on your part, whether positive or negative, can have an impact on people and on the environment. When you are making decisions in your role as a leader it can be a real help to you if can stay conscious of your interconnection with all things.

An example that often helps me to keep my place in the world in perspective is to think about the effect of a purchase of a wooden table or chair. The wood was once part of a tree which was part of a forest. A person was paid to fell the tree, another to cut the wood, and yet another to build the table or chair. Their income may have had a positive effect on their families, just as the loss of the tree may have had a negative impact on the forest or the animals that made that tree their home.

Or, if you give an encouraging word to a young child about their special talent you could influence them to develop their gift so that one day their inventions could change the lives of millions. A poem written “merely” to express oneself can make a stranger reading it online from thousands of miles away feel less alone because there is someone else out there who feels exactly the way they do.

Staying aware of our connection to all things can help you when you’re making decisions or giving advice to those who look to you for leadership.

~~~ DBL-R

One of the surest ways to find encouragement in your efforts in leadership is to learn to recognize and listen to your true inner voice.

It’s not always a simple process because in each of us there are numerous voices that can compete for our attention. Deciding which one to listen to can be troublesome especially when the messages may be quite different and often conflicting. Every time you find yourself in one of those, “Should I or shouldn’t I?” inner conflicts, you’re in the process of hearing at least two conflicting voices.

It may be hard to believe, but only one of those voices is the speaker of truth. Among all your inner voices, your true inner voice is the one which encourages you, gives you hope, and pushes you to trust and believe in yourself and your abilities. What often happens, though, is that the voice that’s telling you that you can’t do something, or shouldn’t do something, speaks so loudly that it drowns out your true inner voice, the voice of truth. Listening to your true inner voice - often the voice of understanding, support, and self-assurance - can help lessen and even resolve internal conflict.

As you move along your path of leadership success there may be times when you sense that your ability to reach your goals may be wavering. It is at these time when listening to your true inner voice is vital.

But, the question I can hear you asking is, “How do I connect with that voice?”

One thing that has helped me is meditation. While you’re meditating you might hear many voices, but the one you should pay attention to is the one that speaks to you with love, understanding, and compassion. It will bolster your spirits and urge you to go after your dreams. And it will never cause confusion, remind you of past mistakes, or cause you to doubt yourself.

Once you learn to recognize that true inner voice, and you listen to the messages it gives you about your value and your true potential, the stronger that voice will become. Likewise, the more you ignore those voices that say you can’t succeed, or you don’t have what it takes to make it, the quieter they will become. Learn to say no to the voices that are judgmental or make you feel unworthy of success, and you will find that you’ll become more positive and less critical of yourself.

Follow the voice of truth.

~~~ DBL-R